The Different perception of S*X

How women and men perceive/interprets s*x varies in different ways. The problems that many people have with relationships and with themselves stems from their idea of S*x. The difference in perception of s*x in men and women can ruin a girl’s life and frustrate a man’s life; it is the reason for many relationship and personal problems. Let me explain.

From very young, women are taught that s*x is special. We are taught to save s*x for marriage or for the person we love, because love is suppose to last forever. Women are taught to save their virginity because it is the one and only sacred thing we have. If we loose our virginity we can never get it back, and if we do loose it to someone insignificant we are ruined and deemed less valuable/special/sacred.

On the contrary, men are taught (either from society, media, older male friends or peers) that they must have as much s*x with as many women as possible. S*x many times is not correlated with love or emotions to men. If we take a young woman with an upbringing as mentioned above and a young man with an upbringing as mentioned above, I’m sure you can imagine what it will produce:

A broken-hearted, lifeless girl with low self esteem/self value; and an insensitive young man with a big ego. In his mind, he has done nothing wrong. In her mind, she has done the biggest wrong she could ever do to herself.

These types of behaviors are carried on to adulthood and women have even learned to adapt to them. It has produced women who are numb and have learned that “catching feelings” won’t get them anywhere. So, they behave the same way men do, have s*x with no strings attached and block all feelings or meaning for s*x. We call these women as Wale did in his newest single “Bad.”

Now the problem is, women with these types of labels are the same women men are taught to stay away from (usually from parents and even friends) when considering a serious relationship.

On the same token, these women, as I stated, are jaded, and SAY they don’t want a relationship, and suppress their  feelings because of what happened to them the last time they became emotionally attached to a man-they were hurt badly.

So as a DEFENSE MECHANISM, women become “Bad”.

Bad, as in willing to have s*x without relationship, be promiscuous and not require fidelity or commitment from a man. No woman does this out of joy, they do this out of hurt.

How do we stop the confusion, misconception, and hurt that comes with s*x? Stop the gender roles and double standards about s*x. Let’s all be on the same page about s*x. Either s*x is something meaningless, part of a basic human need with no real emotional or spiritual meaning, OR s*x is something sacred, that should only be shared with love, commitment, loyalty and integrity. I believe in the latter.

Share this if u agree with me or leave comments where you disagree.